Monday, June 23, 2008

Feeling a little (ok, a lot!) overwhelmed!

I'm not a person who does well with overwhelmedness. It makes me feel very panicky and nervous.

DH and I have not treated with an RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist-basically a fertility specialist). Because we're pretty conservative on what we will and won't consider in terms of artificial reproduction assistance, we never saw the need to see an RE because my OB could do everything we were willing to try. Then when his tests revealed DH's problem, we went to a specialist (the best in the state) for that. But his next steps would have been to send us to an RE too, to do procedures we weren't comfortable with, we basically drew our line in the sand there.

Most people when doing something like a Frozen Embryo Transfer do it with an RE with whom they have an established relationship, so they just call him up and he schedules all the tests and procedures.

We don't have one so we needed to find an RE specifically for the actual transfer, because an OB doesn't do that. But I've only met this doctor once. So I called his office today to see what the next step is. They schedule far out so I figured I could get on the calender. The next step is do a ton of blood work, tests and screenings on both DH and I. He CAN do them or we can have our Primary Care Physician do them. We chose this route because coming from a PCP, they should be covered by our insurance. They're the same tests and should be covered no matter who orders them but we're afraid insurance might freak out if they see a clinic's name on the orders so we're going through our PCP.

So, she proceeds to recite to me all of the tests I need to ask the doctor to order. There are 21 of them for me and an additional 6 for DH.

We'll do 2 of them with my OB because of the nature of the sample's retrieval. So first I had to call and explain to my OB's scheduler, whom I have never met (she's new) and who has no clue about Embryo Adoption or even FET about why I needed to come in for STD screening (joy!).

Then I needed to call our PCP and explain to HIS scheduler why we needed to see him. "Why do you need to see him?" "So that we can ask him to order labs." "How do you know you need them?" "Because another doctor said so." "Why didn't he order them then?" aye yai yai. I think in the end it boiled down to "ok, whatever you say lady-see you next week." So we meet with him to ask him if he can put in orders at the lab to do these 25 other tests. Joy!

I'm just a little overwhelmed. I'm stressed that I'm going to do something in the wrong order or that someone will miss one and we'll have to go back anyway, opening us up for financial risk and extra cost, etc, etc. I'd love it if we lived in California where we could do everything non-medical through Nightlight, and if we had an existing RE and IF insurance coverage where we could do everything else through them. This coordinating everything through so many different agencies is making my head spin.

I'm totally willing to do it. I'm just afraid I'll make a major mistake! I guess it's a feeling I should get used to as we embark on parenting anyway, right? ;)


  1. You might check with your insurance. Many companies who do not cover 'treatments' will cover the testing part even through an RE. It won't matter what name is on it. It just matters how they put the paper work in. They are really good with it. Also REs are usually VERY fast with the testing. This is what they do. They will get you in and out usually in a month. OBs have to schedule tests and consults and whatever around all the other things they do. Just a thought.

    HUGS though, it is all very overwhelming.

  2. I'm with you in the land of overwhelmedness...I'm going through a rough patch myself. *Hugs*

  3. Can you get a written list from the RE that you can present to the other doctors? That way, if a test gets missed, you have backup evidence that it was requested. That happened to me, when I needed one of those STD cultures done, and my OB forgot it. I did have to go back, but I didn't have to pay anything since it was their mistake to miss it. And really, most of those tests are pretty simple and can be accomplished all at once (you know, draw 4 vials of blood and run 8 of those tests, or stuff like that). You'll be surprised at how easy it ends up being, even though it's a lot of information to get all at once.

  4. oh, I feel you. I HATE stuff like that (that is, paperwork, paperwork with huge financial weight, etc.).

    Keep praying! If the Lord leads you there, he will lead you through all the things on the way to getting there. He understands paperwork. :)

    May He bless you in the midst of this!

  5. Ah yes, the art of juggling the screening. None of our infertility treatments were covered by insurance so we were always trying to juggle what we could to get anything covered. It's a frustrating thing at time. But I'm sending lots of good thoughts your way for smooth sailing!

  6. the lab + doc office + insurance jiggle again. Hope it's smooth sailing for you though

  7. I hope everything is working out ok. Sorry it was so overwhelming. I'm not sure how your RE is, but mine isn't that strict. They ordered a bunch of bloodwork and I had my blood drawn at my PCP. Apparently my PCP didn't draw enough blood to do one or two of the tests. Well, I never even went back to get them done and it didn't end up even mattering.

    Hopefully it will all work out so you don't have to worry about it but even if it doesn't, it probably wont be a big deal to rectify the situation.

    Don't stress my dear! You are doing great considering the circumstances!